List: Things More Heavily Regulated Than Buying a Gun in the United States

Having a fucking bake sale Building a fucking shed in your own backyard Pumping fucking gas Getting a fucking vasectomy Owning a fucking car Driving someone else’s fucking car Riding in a fucking car Disposing of fucking batteries Cutting fucking hair for a living Having a controlled bonfire on your own fucking property Owning a fucking dog Walking a fucking dog Selling a fucking mattress Watching a fucking DVD Holding any sort of public fucking performance Importing foreign fucking cheese Changing your last fucking name to your spouse’s Buying fucking fireworks Riding a fucking bicycle Having a fucking swimming pool Xeroxing and distributing copyrighted fucking material Transporting a bottle of opened fucking wine home from a restaurant Using a fucking skateboard Buying unpasteurized fucking milk Recycling